Today's Parent | Parenting Resources… Articles, Advice, Help & Tips

As parents, we love our kids so much that we dread that fateful call—The teacher calling to report that your child is misbehaving, underachieving or that they should be tested for ADHD. Don’t panic. Follow these tips to handle the situation:

1. Be aware of your child’s environment. Explore contexts that are explanations for the behavior, like external stressors. Consider any relevant changes in your family in terms of finances, physical and mental health issues, or other significant factors. Also take into account nutritional factors: too much sugar and skipping breakfast are both linked to difficulty concentrating.

2. Seek solutions. Ask the teacher, “What are we going to do to support her?” Children need to learn how to learn, and every stumbling block in education is not brain dysfunction. Your child may simply need repetition, practice of basic skills, and coaching to excel in school.

3. Consider that your child may not be the problem. Sometimes our children’s learning style and profile of strengths and weaknesses mean that they need accommodations. While changing schools may not be an option, you can still protect your child’s passion and motivation by encouraging them to pursue those things that draw their attention. Read More

September is College Savings Month, a great time for those who are already in college to start developing healthier financial habits. The need is very real: after years of dutifully saving for college, more and more college students are spending their school years piling credit card debt on top of their student loans, leaving them in a deep financial hole upon graduation. This cycle can also lead to stress, depression and decreased academic performance while still in college.

Fixing the problem cannot wait for a student’s entry into the “real world.” College students need a budget plan, money tracking capabilities and access to basic money, credit and debt management information.

“Considering that more students drop out of school because of financial difficulties than academic problems, gaining these basic life skills is right up there in importance with gaining an education itself,” says Jo Bittof, co-founder of Solutions Financial, a financial management consultancy.

According to Ms. Bittof, the earlier one begins the budgeting process, the better – another reason for getting started during September’s College Savings Month. “Just as it is unwise to enter into marriage, a loan contract for a car, or any other financial situation ignorant of one’s ability to handle the obligation, entering college on a fiscal wing and a prayer is a potential set up for failure,” she explains. Read More

When school starts, parents will once again face an increase in ear, nose and throat (ENT) ailments –– which are nothing to sneeze at. But ENT problems often aren’t the result of spreading germs.

Ear, nose and throat problems can come from unexpected sources. By knowing what to look for, parents can better protect their kids. For example:

It’s in the genes. Most doctors agree genes could play a role in susceptibility to ear infections. If one or both parents experienced chronic ear infections growing up, their children are likely to be prone to ear infections too.

Misdiagnosed ADHD instead of sleep apnea. Enlarged tonsils or adenoids can cause sleep apnea––a common ailment in overweight children––which has symptoms similar to Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD). Dr. Pine strongly suggests ruling out sleep apnea, before starting children on ADHD medication. Read More

Question: What do you do when your child is pressuring you for something that conflicts with your principles as a parent?

Do you: (a) look around at what other parents are doing; (b) weigh your child’s grades and other ‘performance’ attributes against your principles; or (c) stand up for what you really believe in?

“This can be a difficult choice for today’s parents,” say Malcolm and Laura Gauld, the heads of Hyde Schools, a network of prep and charter schools in Maine, Connecticut, New York City and Washington DC that focus on character education. “You’ll probably take your lumps if you answer ‘c.’ But there is no better way to raise your child.”

With three decades of experience in teaching students and their families to develop and live in a character culture and two decades of experience in parenting three children of their own, the Gaulds co-authored “The Biggest Job We’ll Ever Have” book and parenting seminars, geared toward helping busy parents stay focused on the things that really matter — principles.

“Say you have a teenager who’s doing well in school, but has a bad attitude,” says Malcolm. “He tells you he wants the latest expensive gadget, like his friends have. Or perhaps he’s spending too much time social networking online and you want him to cut back. Should he be rewarded solely because of his grades? We see parents dismiss bad attitudes or habits when their child is performing well in school. But what message are we sending?” Read More

As your kids return to school, now is the time to take your child’s browsing and interaction safety online into your own hands. What measures can you take to make sure your children are using the Internet in a safe, appropriate way?

By now, you’ve heard tons of advice about how to keep your children safe while they surf the Internet. Some of it is true, but some lead to ineffective strategies that can give parents a false sense of security.

For instance, how many times have you heard that checking the browser history is an effective way to monitor what websites your kids visit? With new browsers comes easier ways to clear your browser history. Mozilla Firefox has the option for ‘private’ browsing sessions, and Google Chrome makes it simple to browse without any track record of your history. Therefore, not only is monitoring the history ineffective, parents will no longer even see that the history has been cleared as an indicator of bad online behavior.

The same goes for Facebook. Just because you are friends with your child on Facebook doesn’t mean that you can see all of his or her activity. Profile privacy settings are becoming easier to manipulate, allowing users to block all updates for individual friends.

And, of course, the issue of cyber-bullying has played a big role in the media lately. This is a legitimate concern for parents as they send their children back to school—so it shouldn’t be taken lightly. Read More

Parents know: Family trips are often far from relaxing, and what’s meant to be a dream vacation can all too quickly turn into a nightmare. But ensuring your trip goes smoothly is easier than you think. As long as the kids aren’t bored, and the parents aren’t stressed, families can avoid the bickering that all too often causes a trip to go awry. Easier said than done, of course, but picking the right hotel will go a long way toward tantrum-proofing your vacation. Avoid these five common mistakes when planning your trip, and you’ll find yourself headed for family vacation bliss.

Top five things parents forget to consider:

1. Your kids’ interests: Kids are just as picky about their vacation, if not pickier, than adults, and it’s worth taking the time to ask them what they want to do. Are they going to be happy in a big city or at the beach? What do they want to do when they get there? You can find a hotel these days with almost any amenity, from trapeze lessons to roller coasters to water parks, so their requests might be easier to fulfill than you think. The important thing is to get them just as excited about the trip as you are.

2. Your kids’ attention spans. Some kids can entertain themselves all day with sand, a bucket, and a shovel. Others will grow bored within minutes. If your kid needs lots of stimulation, steer clear of the quiet beach bungalows and consider an activity-packed megaresort. Read More

Camp is an action-packed adventure. Each day brings new and exciting opportunities for growth and accomplishment. At the same time, strong bonds of friendship and community are developing. It truly is a life-changing experience. And when the embers of the last campfire have cooled, and campers make their way home, often children experience a mild case of the “end of camp blues.”

The blues are not uncommon — causing some children to be tired, moody, quieter than usual, or even irritable or grumpy. The American Camp Association® (ACA) recommends the following tips for families to help ease the transition from camp to home:

• Help them relax and adjust to the slower pace of non-camp life. Suggest they take a warm shower and get plenty of rest. Plan to have an “old favorite” for dinner.

• Encourage reconnecting with friends from home. Volunteer to set up play dates and get-togethers to help re-establish a sense of belonging with friends they haven’t seen in a long time. Read More

1.  Do not skip meals, and especially do not skip breakfast. Breakfast is the energy start for the day. It is the meal that “breaks the fast,” hence the word breakfast. When you skip meals, you rob the body of the fuel it needs to function, like staying awake, and being able to handle stress. When you finally slow down, the hunger creeps up on you and then you tend to overeat or make unhealthy choices. If you can’t find the time to eat a “meal,” then eat something to hold you until you can eat a meal.

2.  Drink 8 – 10 glasses of water per day. Our body is over 60% water.  We need liquid to help transport nutrients, minerals, and energy, etc. to every part of our body.  Water and other non-calorie liquids help keep us healthy and functioning at our best. Drinking water also helps us to remove toxins and other waste products from our body and also help us “poop” without straining.

3.  Eat whole grains. Whole grains have more nutrients, like vitamins and minerals and fiber than processed grains.  When you eat things like whole grain cereals and bread, potatoes, brown rice, you are providing long term fuel for your body, so you feel full longer. You are also giving your body lots of nutrients to stay healthy.  Whole grain foods also help us to remove toxins and dead cells from our bodies and also to “poop” without straining. .

4.  Limit portions. Most of the food we get when we eat out is enough to feed 2 or 3 people. Therefore, it is better to eat ½ of everything that you ordered. This is a way to get the nutrients you need, without the excess calories — and you have food left over for another meal!  So you get to be healthy and save money!

5.  Go lean with protein. All the foods that we get from animals, such as cheese, milk, meat, eggs, fish, chicken, sausage, etc, are naturally high in fat.  However, it is possible to get these foods with less fat in them, for example, 1% or skim milk, non-fat yogurt, lean meat, fish and fowl. Also, it is best to eat these foods baked, broiled, or grilled, not fried.  Frying any food just adds lots of unnecessary fat.  You can also get protein from legumes, such as garbanzo beans, soybeans, white beans, and peas.  Nuts and seeds also provide some protein, but are also high in fat, so they should be eaten in small quantities, i.e. 2 oz. servings. Read More

Nearly one-third of our children are either overweight or obese and the sad fact that this generation is the first not to have the life expectancy of their parents is part and parcel to this.  There is good news however in that one statistic states that the more education people had the less likely they were to be heavy, so let’s all focus on educating ourselves and our children.  Improving children’s health by teaching them to eat better is critical to academic success as well.

BROWN BAG

As parents, we start out the school year with a vow to make more creative, healthier lunches only to have, by mid-December, peanut butter and jelly sandwiches three times a week. This year let’s try something new; involve your child in the creation of their lunches. If they are part of this process, their lunches are more likely to be eaten. Sit down with your child and create a menu. Do try to change your menus seasonally and if possible, purchase organic foods when you can. Here are some ideas for you.

Sample Menus:

Week one

• Monday: Hummus, celery, carrot and red pepper sticks, apple

• Tuesday: Peanut or almond butter sandwich on whole grain bread, broccoli florets with dip of choice, orange slices

• Wednesday: Cold noodle salad, snow peas, and peach

• Thursday: Bean salad, red pepper slices, and apricots

• Friday: Whole grain tortilla with black beans, salsa, lettuce and cheddar cheese

Week two

• Monday: Turkey sandwich on whole grain bread with sprouts and grated carrots, jicama slices with lime juice, nectarine

• Tuesday: Diced chicken drizzled with your favorite dressing, small salad, and apple

• Wednesday: Hardboiled eggs with dip of choice, cucumber slices, red pepper strips and carrot sticks, nectarine

• Thursday: Peanut or almond butter spread on a whole grain tortilla topped with sliced bananas and honey, thinly sliced raw zucchini with dip of choice, orange slices

• Friday: Tuna mixed with chopped olives, chopped celery and mixed with Italian dressing, raw cauliflower, cherry tomatoes

Easy tips:

You need a protein source with each meal, which can be a meat protein such as chicken, turkey or fish such as tuna, or your protein can be from beans, nut butters, tofu, tempeh or eggs. Vegetables are the key to good health; so always have veggies in the lunch. A fruit included is a healthy addition and can be eaten later in the day for a sweet pick-me-up. Veggies and fruits also supply a good carbohydrate source. Healthy fats are also necessary and can be found in avocados, olive or flax oil (used in the bean salad or in the tuna salad), and nuts. Read More

As I prepare to send my second child to college, I feel somewhat more prepared than when I sent my oldest child. Thinking back to when I dropped my daughter off at New York University three years ago, I believed that walking out of the dorm without falling apart would probably be the hardest part. Wrong! The most difficult part of taking my child to college came after several weeks and months at home, when I realized how different our relationship was becoming. My daughter was now on her own in the Big Apple!

While she was in high school, my daughter and I had a wonderful relationship marked by great communication, and I felt that it would continue unchanged. What I did not understand was that she was setting out on her own new adventure, trying to separate from her parents and becoming independent in her new role as a college freshman. Because in the past I had been “up” on everything going on in her world, I was sure that she would call me about every new experience and with a description of every person she had met. When that didn’t happen, I was sad and confused. In fact, the only way I talked to her was if I made the call, and then only if she answered the phone. When we did talk, I got very little information about the big new world she had entered. I realized that her lack of communication was her way of breaking away from home, and she needed me to back off a bit. On top of adjusting to setting one less plate for dinner and walking past her vacant room, I recognized that this was going to be much more difficult than I anticipated. Read More